Paula Vital
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“Transforming yourself is a means of giving light to the whole world.”

~Ramana Maharshi

 

As high achievers, we may often feel that taking a time out to heal yourself, physically, mentally or emotionally, is a loser’s game. Why can’t we just suck it up, stuff it down and keep on achieving? After all, aren’t we on a mission to make a better world?

 

Well, it turns out, that time spent on healing you is actually time spent on healing the world.

 

The greatest gift you can give the world is the gift of your love and light. And there is no better way to light up the world than to ensure that your own light is shining as brightly as possible.  And this requires healing.

 

My healing journey began as an attorney over 10 years ago, when all the striving and achieving seemed to have left me with my light totally crashed and burned out. There was no light left, even though on the outside it seemed that I had it all together.

 

I had been living a life that was meant to please others, to show my parents how great I was, and to show the world that I was really a wonderful, smart, accomplished person.

 

I had left one person out of that pleasing equation – me.

 

What did I actually want to do? What did I actually even need? I had no idea, because I had worked so hard at achieving whatever I was told was the next thing to achieve.

 

The last 10 years or so have been a journey of undoing. Letting go of all the ways in which I divorced aspects of myself in order to fit in, push ahead, and keep on going.

 

The more I am called to slow down and allow myself to do so (quieting the voices freaking out at the prospect of doing less) the more energy, vitality and clarity I have to do the things that actually bring me joy, delight, and a real sense of purpose and meaning.

 

The things I choose to do become a reflection of my deepest self, and the more that self has been nurtured, nourished and cared for, the more that self can then light up those around me.

 

Helping others and the world becomes effortless when it is a reflection of who you are and what you love.

 

Here are 12 steps you can take in your healing process:

 

1) Notice how you talk to yourself. Change your self-talk from judgment to kindness whenever possible. Whenever you put yourself down, apologize and reframe it in a positive way.

 

2) Take a moment to appreciate, and maybe even write down, the many great things and people in your life.

 

3) Remind yourself that just as you are, in this moment, you are enough.

 

4) Create space in your calendar for 10 minutes every day for you to sit in nature without needing to do anything.

 

5) Speak up for what you want and need. Give yourself permission to say no in a kind but clear way to things that do not feel nourishing or peaceful.

 

6) Pay attention to what you put into your body. Notice the foods that leave you feeling light and full of energy, and the ones that drain you. Choose more of what feels good.

 

7) Schedule some time with friends and family who light you up. Join a meet-up or group of group of like-minded people who share some of your passions and interests. Invite a colleague to go for coffee.

 

8) Revisit your past. Feel your anger, fear and sadness and be willing to let go of resentment. Reframe memories in ways that honour the growth that came from the challenge.

 

9) Listen to, value, honour and entertain even the craziest and most improbable dreams.

 

10) Stay open and curious.

 

11) Notice when you feel shame. Take small steps to show your authentic self to others, and express yourself fully.

 

12) Be present with yourself, and embrace the whole of you, moment by moment, always.

 

Healing begins when you choose to stop being everything to everyone, and begin spending some time with yourself.

 

Mindfulness meditation is a wonderful way to tap into who you are, just as you are, in this moment, creating space to notice how you are feeling and what you need.

 

Start with one breath.    Right now.   Just as you are.     And let the magic begin.

 

Post a comment below to let us know if you have ever struggled with setting aside time for your own healing or if this resonated with you.

 

If you haven’t yet entered our FREE giveaway for three life-changing books by Brené Brown, enter here! Hurry and enter today because the contest is only on for the month of July!

 

If you liked this article, check out:

 

What’s in Your Treasure Box?

Fitting in ‘You-Time’ Even When You Have No Time For You

Reignite a Passion You’ve Neglected

 

 

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